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Some Wednesday Ramblings

First, because it’s Wednesday, it’s always a good day to stop and feel connected!

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I started blogging on Chinese honey (which might be tomorrow’s blog… who’s to say?) and just decided that I needed to do a U-turn for a different Wednesday blog. What have I read recently that made me laugh. Then it came to me like Nate the Great!

I decided to post some church bulletin announcements that probably made those congregations laugh:

• Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and the community.
• For those of you who have children and don’t know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
• The rosebud on the altar this morning is to announce the birth of David Alan Belzer, the sin of Rev. and Mrs. Julius Belzer.
• This afternoon there will be a meeting in the south and north ends of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends.
• Wednesday, the Ladies Liturgy Society will meet. Mrs. Jones will sing “Put Me In My Little Bed” accompanied by the pastor.
• Thursday at 5:00 p.m. there will be a meeting of the Little Mothers Club. All wishing to become little mothers, please see the minister in his study.
• The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind and they may be seen in the church basement Friday.
• A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.
• At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be “What Is Hell?” – come early and listen to our choir practice.
• “Ladies, don’t forget the rummage sale. It’s a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Don’t forget your husbands.”

• The Associate Minister unveiled the church’s new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday “I Upped My Pledge – Up Yours.”
• Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person(s) you want remembered.
• The church will host an evening of fine dining, superb entertainment, and gracious hostility.
• The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday morning.
• Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday. Please use the back door.
• Weight Watchers will meet at 7:00 p.m. at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.

And for pic o’ day, I am reaching back to a past one as a reminder that I know that I will face lots of food temptations in November. A good mid-week workout reminder:

staying-fit

Riddle Me This

How do you get out of a room that has no windows or doors and the only thing in the room is a mirror? Answer: You look in the mirror and you see what you saw. With the saw, you cut the mirror in half. Two halves make a hole… and you crawl out!

Why are fire engines red?

     Books are read, and magazines are read, too. Two plus two is four. Four times three is 12. There are 12 inches in a ruler. Queen Elizabeth was a ruler. Queen Elizabeth was also a ship. Ships sail in the sea. Fish swim in the sea. Fish have fins. Finns fought the Russians. Russians are always red. Fire engines are always rushin’. And THAT is why fire engines are red.

Yes, these riddles make no sense at all really. Maybe that’s why they remind me of insurance ads.

A recent ad that was created in Richmond by the Martin Agency features a magician and his trainee/protegee in medieval days, sitting at a table. The magician is teaching “his tricks” by starting out with his first riddle/question:  “Trick Number One… Lookest over there”. His trainee looks over in the direction that the magician indicated. The magician then says, “Ha-Ha! Madest thou look. So endeth the trick”.

Maybe it’s just me, but this ad/riddle seems to be the hidden message of the insurance company campaign. Distract with pricing by getting people to look only at pricing. That way, they don’t worry about whether the insurance company will be there with benefit when they need the coverage. “Hey, look over here at our pricing not our coverage”. Yes, I could write a very long blog on this topic of torment for me.

Speaking of marketing, DID YOU KNOW that Colgate faced a very big obstacle in marketing their toothpaste in Spanish speaking countries. Colgate sounds like the word in Spanish (from the root word colgar)  that means “Go hang yourself”.

And for pic o’ day, here is a funny that was sent to me:

Love grand

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